Joshua Kaufman self tape Monologue

 Self-Tape Monologue

Character: This character is a version of yourself. Naturalistic. Serious / Non-Comedic. Talking to an imagined scene partner of your choice.--

You know, despite all the bullshit that comes along with it – 

I remember my childhood as this, you know, this magical time. 

I do. I remember when, uh, my mother first told me about death. My great-grandmother had just died and my whole family had just visited them in Florida. 

I was about three, three and a half years old. 

Anyway, I was in the backyard playing, and 

my sister had just taught me how to take the garden hose, and

 do it in such a way that, uh, you could spray it into the sun. And you could make a rainbow. 

And so I was doing that, 

and through the mist I could see my grandmother. 

And she was just standing there, smiling at me. 

And, uh, then I held it there, for a long time, and I looked at her.

 And then finally, I let go of the nozzle, you know, and then I dropped the hose, and she disappeared. 

And so I went back inside and I tell my parents, you know. 

And they, uh, sit me down and give me this big rap on how when people die you never see them again, and how I’d imagined it.

 But I knew what I’d seen. And I was just glad that I saw that. 

I mean, I’ve never seen anything like that since. But, I don’t know, it just kind of let me know how ambiguous everything was, you know, even death.